Bryce Angell is a cowboy poet. Angell was raised on a farm/ranch in the St. Anthony, Idaho area with approximately 75 head of horses. Horses remain an important part of Angell’s life.
Angell shares his poetry with Cache Valley Daily every Friday.
I’m short by all the standards, ‘cuz I stand at five foot three. It has never been a
problem, but today I’d disagree.
I’d driven down to Merkle’s Store to buy some brand-new jeans. Old Merkle said,
“You’ll find ‘em stacked behind the pork and beans.”
I fumbled through the sizes, found a pair that fit just right. But the Wranglers
were all priced the same, no matter what your height.
I’d taken economics and this wasn’t making sense. The cowboys with the longer
legs weren’t sharing my expense.
My inseam’s length is 30 and that’s stretching it a bit. An inseam long as 36 would
reach to my armpit.
So, I did the mathematics. It was plumb unfair to me. Old Merkle reasoned,
“Pants are priced right from the factory.”
Well paying more for trousers kinda stuck right in my craw. I said to Mr. Merkle,
“Sir, there otta be a law.”
I’m sure that Mr. Merkle thought my mind was kinda slow. But little did he realize
this cowboy’s in the know.
I vowed to get my money’s worth and prove the prices wrong. So, I bought a
pair of brand-new pants four sizes extra-long.
I pulled my brand-new britches on and cinched my belt up tight. Ole Merkle
shook his head and said, “You’re really quite a sight.”
I thanked him for the compliment. How nice of him to say. Then hiked my extra-
long jeans up and headed on my way.
The bottoms of my brand-new jeans were frayed by afternoon. So, I trimmed
‘em with my knife. Ain’t I a country boy buffoon!
Well, I hurried back to Merkle’s for some 30 inseam jeans. Ole Merkle stood
there smiling. Said, “Behind the pork and beans.”